Yesterday, I was sitting with AJ, my 4 year old, clicking through blogs and reading through emails. The following picture caught his eye and he asked if we could watch the Juice Box Jungle video together. I suppose the picture of a screaming mom pulling her hair out looked a little silly to him.
We sat back and watched the video together.
More parenting videos on JuiceBoxJungle
I have always considered myself a calm person. I am pretty even tempered. Just last night, a couple of friends were commenting on how I am a person who thinks before she speaks. I am careful with my words. Sometimes too careful.
I hate to admit it, but despite my tendency to be quiet, I lose it with my kids. Usually, I lose it over completely silly things. The clicking noise that a child is making on the counter. Whistling. Someone’s innocent question.
But whatever it is, I usually lose it because I have held in my frustration for long enough and I can’t take one more thing bombarding my senses. The fact is, it’s just not healthy to hold emotions in all the time. And that’s what I do. I want to be strong. I want to put on the good face. But I can’t do it all the time. Just last month, I wrote a post about how I feel like Dr Jekyll and Mr (Mama) Hyde. One minute I’m nice mommy, the next, I’m a monster.
I think I’ve done a better job in the last month staying even tempered. Being even does not mean that I am happy all the time. It doesn’t mean that I don’t get mad. But I would like to have fewer cases of “losing it.”
Do you lose it? Do you wish you lost it less often? What helps you stay even tempered more of the time?
I know sleep is a huge factor for me. Less sleep=more losin’ it. More sleep=more able to handle the ups and downs of mothering. So why is it so hard for me to get adequate sleep?
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It's so comforting to read someone else's words when they could have come out of my own mouth! I definitely lose it. I just lost it yesterday with *my* 4-year-old. My biggest trigger lately is the lack of listening/following directions/respect I get from my boys.
I remember your Jekyll/Hyde post and how I felt like it was describing me! Thanks for your honesty!
Yep, I loose it. It's hard not to when you have young kids around! I think me loosing it is what makes me hesitate to get a babysitter when ALL the kids are up. It's hard for me, how could a 13 year old handle it?!
Anyway, I'm looking forward to our movie this week! It'll be a sorely needed break.
We wouldn't be moms if we didn't lose it!!! I find a big trigger is the noise level. As the noise level goes up my grip on control goes down. The kids just haven't figured that out…despite how many times I've tried to explain it!
I know what you mean. I find I get more accomplished in the wee hours after everyone is asleep. Sadly, that's also probably why my DD points out my dark circles from time to time.
Completely relate, I lose it way more than I ever I thought I would as a Mom. Now I worry that someday they will sit around as adults and reminisce about that time mom freaked out!
You have kids that is why you need more sleep. Kids try your patience everyday. I have 4 kids and 10 grandkids and it is a struggle everyday to keep my patience. My husband says I have no patience because I keep loosing it.
I think that what some people call “losing it” varies so much. Many moms are too hard on themselves & others need to step away (even Momma can benefit from a “time out” or “rest”). We all have moments that we look back on & wish we could do over.
Oh yes Lolli! I absolutely lose it with my Kaish ALL the time. I don't even know why it happens. I just get so stressed. Before I can even think about it I am freaking out. It is craziness for sure!
I lose it too and there time people have said I'm calm with the 5 kids too…but there are times I'm screaming in my head. There are good days and bad days with the kids.
The older I get, the more I realize that how I'm feeling is very dependent on how I am taking care of myself. Sleep, food, exercising, etc all play a huge role in my emotional well-being. I think that you're on the right path just recognizing your triggers, recognizing that you want to do better.
I used to hold everything in and be calm but then I was getting too sick. I went the other way and was too honest and lost it too much. IMHO Now, I am trying to find a balence between the two. It sounds like that it is a common theme among women even though we often feel we are the only ones that get idiotic for a minute.
I have to admit that whistling drives me crazy. I think it is as annoying to me as a dog whistle is to dogs. I clench my teeth and fists when my husband starts and sometimes I lose it because I've told him. Simple act but drives me crazy instantly.
if tired i cant handle children LOL its my hubby who takes care of him as yes i'll lose it straight away. normally sleep and if that cant happen deep breathing keeps me sane.
Just got home from work and am now following you! Can't wait to check you out some more!
I can very much relate to the Jekyll/Mama Hyde thing. There definitely is a physical side to it. It's definitely worse if I'm hungry, too tired, or PMSing/Menopausing. But I feel bad that my kids suffer because of it. But on the other hand, I have trained them about certain things. I can.not.stand repetitive noises, so they have learned if that will not be tolerated.
In fact, I even have an official policy on it. All I have to say is “What is my policy on annoying noises?” and they say in chorus “They aren't allowed”. OK then – and it stops.
Lose IT? somedays I wake up missing IT all together! Other days, I am in full control of IT. Still, other days IT comes and goes like the right shoe, the remote control, the other blanket, the telephone, the baby, etc.
Likewise, my horn protrude and retract depending on the weather. After reading your blog I see this is a very common mommy ailment.
I am so glad that I am not the only one. :) And, yes, raising so many
kids (often without a husband around) is tough work, and it takes so
much out of you.
I can relate. When I lose it, it's usually at my dogs (the barking drives me mad). Or the hubby. The key for me is making sure that I eat. And eat healthy. I can feel my anxiety and frustration rise when I haven't eaten enough. A quick snack or lunch usually helps reduce my losing it moments.
You just described me to a “T.” I try to stay upbeat and optimistic but the fact is that raising 6 kids is hard (especially with a husband gone) and I'm exhausted. And that comes out when the kids are asking too many questions or someone poked their sister or whatever. And then I yell or overreact because I'm trying so hard not to cry the rest of the time that I just blow up. You know what? I feel better just admitting this. Thanks for posting this! It was just what I needed to read today.