How to Avoid Cleaning the House in 10 Simple Steps

When my kids were little and taking care of them (and my house) was my only job, I remember thinking ahead to the day when all of my kids would be in school and I would be in an empty house for 6 hours each day.

When I was in the middle of the toddler and baby years, surrounded by baby toys and diapers, I dreamed of the day when I had the house to myself. It was hard to imagine what I would do with all of my time if I didn’t have 5 kids underfoot all day long. The possibilities, according to my imagination, were endless. I envisioned staying on top of the cleaning – my house would NEVER be messy! I imagined that I would prepare the dinners ahead of time so that the pre-dinner hour would be smooth and pleasant. I would read more books, catch up on all of my scrapbooks, and take on a few more hobbies.

My youngest son started full day kindergarten last year. This year began my second year with all five kids in school. Instead of spending all of my time cleaning and cooking and reading books, I spend my time writing and managing two websites – my own and 5 Minutes for Mom. Instead of having extra time on my hands now that my kids are in school, I have less time than ever.

If I’ve learned anything these last few years, it has been how to avoid cleaning the house. In fact, I’ve gotten pretty good at it.

Since I have become somewhat of an expert at avoiding cleaning, I figured that I would share my expertise with those of you who might not know how to go about it.

How to avoid house cleaning

 

1. Stay up past midnight every night working and then get up at 5 am. Fatigue is a proven cleanliness-killer.
2. Wait for the kids to clean – they’ll get to it eventually (though yelling and threatening may be required).
3. Over-schedule your days and evenings – it’s easy to avoid cleaning when you are never around.
4. Plan to clean after the kids get home from school – that’s as good as not planning at all.
5. Plan to clean when company comes over….and then never invite anybody over (who has time to be social, anyway?).
6. Do everything at the last minute – there’s nothing like running around under a deadline to create a mess that has to be dealt with later.
7. Use the excuse “I’d rather spend time with my kids than clean.” You’ll feel like a better mom (though your house will still be dirty).
8. Sign up for a few kids’ sports teams  – keeping Saturdays busy, too, will help you avoid cleaning time as well.
9. Concentrate on the main room of the house – if the “visible” room is clean, then none of the other rooms matter.
10. Use the “I’ve got to work” card as often as possible. Making money is more important than cleaning the house, right?

Ok, so maybe this is really plea for help. I just find it sad that my house was cleaner when I had babies and toddlers running around. What are your tips to keeping your house clean and not getting so far behind?

 

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