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You are here: Home / That's life! / Thoughts on being a (better) mom

Thoughts on being a (better) mom

Friday, February 15, 2008 by Lolli Leave a Comment

Last night, I read a post from my friend, Deanna, that made me stop and think. I was floored because it sounded like ME. How could she echo so completely my own thoughts and faults? Deanna, I hope you don’t mind me copying and pasting some of your words, because I think they are worthy of sharing, as a reminder to myself and anybody else out there who may be feeling the same way. Plus, you said it so well! :) I am constantly amazed that every time I think I’m alone in what I’m feeling or going through, I discover someone else who understands. Someone who has gone through the same thing. Aren’t girl friends wonderful for that?? So, everyone, read on, and insert your own kids names below….

“I love my children. I am proud of them in so many ways. I want to be close to them, and want them to feel like they can come to me for anything. But instead when they do, I criticize, get frustrated, yell too much, push away too often, and in general, probably make them feel like they are in my way. I don’t mean to. I have no explanation.
I chose motherhood. It was not forced upon me, I chose it. I’ve even had to fight for it a few times, with every fiber of my being. I chose motherhood because it is a privilege and an honor. I chose motherhood because it is a win-win situation. I have let the negative creep into my life too much, and I suddenly realized that I’ve wasted too much time. Life is precious. Children are precious. They deserve my undivided attention. Next time Miranda shows me a picture she drew, I promise to stop whatever I’m doing, look her in the eye, and tell her I think it’s the most beautiful project ever – instead of not so much as giving it a glance, and then saying, “Good job, but I’m busy right now.” I promise that when Johnny asks if he can help cook dinner, I won’t say, “There isn’t much left to do, but thanks anyway,” I will make up something if I have to, just to have him by my side. I promise that if Jared asks for help with his homework, I won’t say, “Go ask dad because he’s better at math,” I will say, “Sure, let’s sit down and figure this out together.” I will even sit on the floor and play with a block tower with Madilyn – just like I watched my husband do the other day… while I was watching TV.
I promise to make the time. I promise to take the time. We never know what trials await us, and I want to make sure I have taken full advantage of every opportunity to bask in their unconditional love. No, this isn’t a confessional. Just a reminder to myself. “

Thanks, Deanna, for great words of motivation! And, just for kicks, here is the one picture that I have of our oldest kids together…You’d think that, during the hours and hours that the 4 of us spent together playing games, watching When Animals Attack (haha!), and chatting that we would have pulled the camera out more than once. ;)

(Kiwi and Jared)

© 2008, Food Fun Family. All rights reserved.

About Lolli

Lolli has written 3740 post in this blog.

I became a mom in 1996, and in 2005 I had my fifth. Yes, 5 kids. In 2007, this blog was born (my 6th baby that will never grow up) and I've been sharing recipes, photography tricks, parenting tips, and everything in between. (Formerly Better in Bulk)

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